Another goodbye

I have said goodbye too many times.

At too many places.

It used to be at the lobby before she gave me that first peck.

On the phone upon the break of dawn.

At the island, as I did my duty.

And right by the gates as she took the taxi home.

It was hard holding myself back, when she went away.

It was harder every night we're online.

I should've spared more, than just a hug, when I was there

But a goodbye's never right if you're to say it

In the first place

Our goodbyes were spoken at many lands.

In various ways, in as many emotions.

Unwilling and ever reluctant, nevertheless inevitable.

We go our separate ways; yet together

Everytime.

Another goodbye will be said

Today.

Another last glance before I turn the corner.

Another pause as I remember your smile.

Another smile as it comes so easy.

Another long breath as I brace myself.

Another step as I make my way.

Another time till we meet again.

It won't be long till our paths

Cross again.

Billy Connoly's Chain Letter

This was forwarded to me from a friend.

BILLY CONNOLLY'S CHAIN LETTER

Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000? I don't fucking think so! How stupid are we?

Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a 21 year old nymphomaniac super model I just happen to run into the next day! What a load of bollocks.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomise me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought ashore by midget pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour. Fuck 'em!!

If you're going to forward something at least send me something mildly amusing.
I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwarded about 90 times. I don't fucking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's your own unpopularity. The point being, if you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by trying to make them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 pence per letter he'll receive if you forward an email.

Now, forward this to everyone you know otherwise tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will chew your bollocks or nether regions off.

Have a nice day.
Billy Connolly
PS: Send me 15 quid and fuck off!

And don't send me personal quizzes either. I barely even know my own good friends, what makes u think 10 questions randomly picked out of someone's arse can make me seem more transparent to u?

Something new...everyday.

Guess what? Another site has been banned. Flixster is down so i cannot indulge an acquaintance in a friendly game of movie trivia. Which makes the World Wide Web in the UAE so much more interesting now cos i seem to engage myself in some form of online tikam-tikam game whenever i try to log on to a site.

"Why is it taking so long?", "How come it's redirecting?", "Wait a minute, oh shit, could it be...DUM DUM DUM...blocked?", "Nah...it shouldn't be. I don't think there's any form of por....it's blocked."

Talking about websites taking ages to upload, i just read a local mag whilst shitting the other day and read an interesting article about ISP subscription charges. I found out that people here pay about SGD$100 for the ridiculously blinding speed of 1Mbps.

My cool can of lemon barley became beer by the time i get to watch videos on youtube.

They say it's something to do with the number of internet users over here. It more or less makes sense cos until there is a demand, there's nothing else u can do but read a book (or probably finish it) while waiting for that bloody picture to appear.

I just heard from Niza, again, whilst shitting, that a friend of hers is applying for Emirates and has passed thru all her interviews. It seems things haven't gone so well for her back in SG so we're kinda glad she made that decision to start afresh. Kudos to her for making that brave new step.

So, amcm posa? Gerek? Haus? Over here the temperature outside can go up to 40++ degrees but in this apartment it's at a shit-cold constant of -10 degrees (i think) so Niza and I spend the day curled up under the duvet. Nothing like waking up and rushing to the kitchen to cook for buka. Ni la time aku rindu Mummy. What i would give to have her bening udang. Or even her asam pedas that's neither masam nor pedas. So it's lauk merah-merah with ikan.

But kita tido the whole day cos ader reason tau. Pasal malam lepas buka kiter karaoke lagu raya ngan lagu rock lama-lama sampai lepas sahor. Behtu bual konz sampai kol 10. Sanggop beli mic baru yg murah dan tak berguna pasal suara emas kita asek tak kuar. Rupanyer blom setup karaoke peh function.

First time aku "posa" tapi malam melalak lagu Bunga Larangan sampai, as how Amir would say it, tarik suara sampai urat kentot putos. Tapi lagu tu tak fair. Jantan skarang mana bleh buat suara gitu? Kalau Isa bleh la. Dier special. Dier takder b*pleh.

So aku step Fandy Ariwatan. Niza plak pandai rap Angguk2 Geleng2 ngan Khalifah. Memang lagu tu irritating tapi dis is Dubai, so u learn to make the best out of everything. And lagu My Heart telah dimainkan kira-kira tidak terkira kerana smuer orang nak nyanyi lagu tu. Tapi biler time nyanyi taktau. Takper, yakin mau ada. Ader plak sungguh2 nyanyi dengan rupa yg penuh menghayati isi dan inti puisi lagu namun suaranya macam blender yg mengejot kamu dari lena.

Akhir skali, aku sempat abes baca buku Air Babylon. And i am proud to say 99% of it was read while i was shitting.

So, tuan tuan dan puan puan, hingga kiter bertemu lagi di waktu dan saluran yg sama, selamat menyambut bulan Ramadan yg mulia ini dan ingat, setiap kali anda membuang air besar, lakukanlah aktiviti-aktiviti yg produktif seperti berbual atau membaca.

Back in Business!

I can now get back in Multiply cos the UAE has recently lifted the ban on the website.

Why the ban?Maybe Multiply got too many ugly people posting pics. Who the hell knows? I'm just pleased my cold-turkey is over.

Now i can cross-post my entries to both my Blogger and Multiply accounts. Which is very convenient for lazy blokes like me.

I'm kinda fed-up with the CSS on both my accounts and there seem to be no antidote for this so i decided to simply opt for this dodgy theme. Hope u like it as much as i don't. It's the least dramatic one around.

Last but not least, Happy Birthday to you Goodfellas. Can see u guys had a smashing time.

To many more years...

Slamat berposa sumer!

Yes, it is dat time of the year.


Jgn eksen selit kat toilet minum air paip eh?


Takmoh step komor-komor beh telan eh?


Mulot tu jaga kewangiannyer sikit, jgn mcm sebulan lepas lom diberos.


Senyum lebih sikit, it's a good month. Not ur last.


Biler buka jgn gejoloh. Rilek, makanan takkan lari. Kalau lari, kejar.


Ok la, tu jer pesanku kepadamu. Wen i come back, jgn malu2 ajak iftar eh? Kita gi makan spesel-spesel la. Bleh catch-up!


Tapi yg ajak kene banjer!

Why always like dis one?

I donno about u but i'm having problems with my entry formats.

Does it look messy to u?

It's spaced out at the wrong places. I usually read my entries after publishing and it looks so freakin irritating.

Anybody got any ideas?

____________

I just collected my baju raya. It's a kurta. The tailor said i wanted that Shah Rukh Khan look. But when i wore it, its leaning towards the Genghis Khan or Bu Khan Bu Khan.

Too bad, harapkan tinggi jer.

K la, gotta look for food.

I passed!

I have not read the mail, I only heard it from my mom who checked it for me, but after a year of group projects and many, many nights memorising and trying to understand concepts, tables and formulas, i can safely say that i have passed my exams.

U may all clap now.

Thank you.

Now, let's see what i can complain today. Oh yah, partying.

I can't party anymore. I tried but my body refuses to comply. Remember that Zinc thing i did a few nights ago? It was interesting, yes, but only for the first hour. We went in at around 12 and i was yawning by 1. I kept looking at my watch. Bedtime? Already? Not really cos i only sleep after 4am and that's like 8am SG time.

So what's the problem here? I had asked Niza about this when we were on our way to the club. Don't mind the drama that's about to unfold:

Niza: "Why do people party?" I felt her eyes leave the window to fix on me.

Me: "Drink, dance...meet people." I replied, still staring out. "You know, have fun." I turned to look at her. That new silver dress, her pretty hairdo and that dim light coming in from the traffic made her look very....sexy.

Niza: "Why do YOU party?" She pointed a finger-gun at my nose.

Me: "To drink." I gave my eyebrows 2 quick push-ups whilst covering her target.

Niza: She smiled back, crossed her legs and cocked her head to her left, "And?"

Me: "And probably squeeze a few laughs in between my next round. Wait, am i supposed to dance tonight?" She sensed my developing uneasiness of her questions and quickly answered,

Niza: "There you go." Her hands spreading out as if laying some invisible file. "You're here, with me, in this cab, simply as a bodyguard. You hate having to dress up to have a pint at some dodgy bar. You're more than happy to have it at home. You won't dance and u'd hate to be caught eye-ing another girl. Men are hunters and they like to hunt in clubs and bars and possibly anywhere a female would most likely get drunk or foolish. Hopefully both. But unlike most men, you're not up for the hunt anymore cos u know u already have me. You know better than to try ur luck cos u see no point in trying." With her back barely leaving the seat, she continued.

Niza: "In other words, you my dear, have lost ur hunt-mojo. My boyfriend has lost his will....to kill"

And with that, she returned her gaze to the window, again.

If not for the grin trailing after that last sentence i am pretty sure she was mocking me. In spite of her thinly veiled insult at my manhood, her speech does contain some truths and i'm fairly pleased with her knowledge of her significant other to the point that i'm quite impressed. Besides, all that serious talk was really turning me on.

Me: "Do we really have to go to this Zinc place? I know a place where it's more private, i can turn on some soft music and u can take off those pesky heels and remov.."

Niza: "Stop it. The hunter may lost his will, but I am tired of the cave."

This goes to the fellas out there:

Let me grab this chance to state that, for the record, i still have my balls. There are still in my shorts, wrinkled as ever. Just hear me out will u?

I know a fine specimen when i see one. And i love looking at pretty things. When u've been with someone for so long, getting caught looking at other girls should be the least of ur worries. I have seen a few whilst Bb's around tho. But I got caught too many times (*goat smile*).

Over the years, I have honed my skills to such perfection that i can detect Bb looking at me as soon as a pretty thing is within radar. She is trying to see if i'm gonna sneak a peek. So i feint ignorance. (Aha..not this time woman!) It's always better to buat bodo den to memandai.

So Bb's right, i hate partying. But that wasn't how it used to be.

Back in the day, which was obviously not too long ago, i partied like there was no tomorrow. I thought every night was gonna be the best night in my life. Drinking was cool and getting drunk was even cooler. Everyone's your best friend and girl's always look better after that 3rd glass. And when tomorrow does come, i ignore my dry, sawdust throat and do it all over again.

I remembered spending every night for 2 weeks at this underage mecca called Jamz. For what u say? Who knows? But it was fun. Well, I thought it was. Ur young and all u want is to see and be seen. U know the manager, the manager acknowledges ur there and u got ur own cosy spot where u and ur mates sit back and enjoy the evening. Thinking back, i spent more time in that club than most of the staff.

Still, at the end of the day, i was never satisfied. I guess that phase has come and gone.

Now, another good example is this place i went last week called Loft. The place was nice and the music was great, and i had the pleasure of accompanying a pack of very attractive young women and attracting many envious stares but still, i didn't really enjoy myself.

Yeah right u say, but honestly, I had more fun at the after-party when all of us, and some Arab dudes, shed tears laughing at witty one-liners a fella called Abdullah kept coughing out.

So the verdict still remains that i am not one for the party scene. I've been deservedly called lamp post a few times. Maybe i'm party-jaded. Boring old me is no fun on the dance floor anymore.

Then again, maybe that's a good thing.

The hunter is retired.

For now.

Sudala Fandy, kepala da nak botak tu gi cepat carik duit pastu kawin.

I know...i know...

She is back

That explains why i am too busy to write.

Hmm...what have we been doing?

Let me recall in non-chronological wise:

1. Went to a drinking hole called Zinc where it's supposedly popular with Air Crew peeper. Saw a lot of fat dudes tho. I hope they're from an airline i'd never have to take.
2. Went to tempah baju for Raya at Chainani, a tailor / kain selling fella. I'm not caring much for the spelling cos the dude's an Indian who speaks better Malay than i do and his shop's in the middle of the Middle East and, well, if u think i sound confusing, I find it even harder to point out his sexual orientation. My baju's abit too plain i think but i'm a dude so flowers and flashy embroidery won't work too well with my goatee. Bb's dress however would look spectaular. The kain was really really pretty. How would i know? I chose the colours.
3. Had a birthday thingy for Amir, Bb's colleague, at the house last night. Everyone cooked and i'm not sure if it was tasty or not but all of us hadn't eaten anything the whole day so everything finished rather quickly. We rounded the supposedly nice feast with an equally fantastic cake. Ok, i normally do not do cakes cos more often than not i'm treated to something too muak or factory produced. But the geniuses at French Bakery made The Best Strawberry Cheesecake i've ever laid my tongue on. I would love to describe but words do not give justice to the brilliance that was that cake. Anyway, i'm too busy finishing up another piece (my 5th)to write more.
4. Bb came back with a SuperHOT hairdo and colour(told u this wasn't gonna be a systematic recollection). Really really loved the colour and cut. I can safely say that cos if it wasn't, all hell would've broken loose. Could only be done by The Lady, S, who manages a salon at Novena. Charges rather reasonable too. I'd love to tell u more about her magic fingers but Niza already finds it impossible to get an appointment with the woman so i guess all the best with ur next trim. Heh.
5. Went shopping with Niza and saw mutants. Some wearing abayah's too. I don't get women in Dubai (thankfully not). I think the amount of make-up they smack on is such a health hazard for them and the general public. Wait, screw them, it's a public hazard! Almost had heart failure when i saw a supposed female with what looks like beige Dulux Weathershield Undercoat as foundation. There was pink blusher spray painted on her cheeks and kiwi shoe polish for eyeshadow. Its lips were fire-extinguisher red with similar girth and size, and if i'm not wrong, it had teeth stolen from a preserved babboon. These goblins move around in packs so u can hardly miss them. Seriously, overkill is an understatement. I started imagining them not removing their makeup - ever - since like, puberty, cos u know, how else could they get that effect? If u still cannot imagine the ladies here then i suggest u take a walk down Orchard Towers and check out our friendly ladyboy makeup, theirs have much lesser drama mind u, or watch Gremlins; the horny "female" one. There u go. I have said this to Niza so many times but i'll repeat myself just for my loyal readers: If i can get just one and pin it by the neck, please let me scrub its face. I'm pretty sure there's a woman lying there somewhere.
6. I love Red Heels. They are very kinky. And they make Fandy a very happy boy. Ok enuff.
7. Played Twister with Bb during Amir's birthday. I'm one helluva player sia. Only cos i take up so much space and people don't seem to like having their faces up my arse. Kesian Bb. Watched Ali Setan and Marah-Marah Sayang during the birthday party. U cannot help but enjoy the cheesyness of the 80's.

Ok la, that's abt it. Apart from scaring myself silly looking at monsters, i'm having such a splendid time having Niza around again. She was quite pleased i kept the place in one piece.

Still, after doing such a good job cleaning up the place, i think she messes up the place more than i do.

Us and our red tapes

I got so pissed i was woken up early that i screwed 2 customer service occifers within 20mins. Long-distance sumore! And thinking about the trunk call i was making (UAE rates are ridiculous!!) made things even worse for the second occifer.


The first one quickly made things easy for her albeit the Singaporean way: shoo me off to another number saying its not her duty and that i was making this call to her mistakenly.


The second was kinda good tho, she addressed my issues and even gave me solutions despite me making no sense of myself. I know because i gots meself thinking why did i call her in the first place. Oh ya, to ask for my laptop.


Fine, let me explain things. I was supposed to collect / redeem / rob a Compaq Presario Notebook from HP at Funan as an offer for signing up with Starhub on their new Maxonline offer. Yippee.


Actual plan was to make my way to Funan and since i'm not in SG, simply authorize someone to collect it on my behalf. All the necessary documents are printed and ready for the transaction. But they made a mistake (Aha...here comes the tricky part) in their installation of certain parts within the laptop. And as the new mail also says, they are giving me 3 options as a gesture of goodwill. One of the options - the one i'm opting for - is to make a one-to-one exchange for another, supposedly better, laptop model. I'm now beginning to wonder if that gesture requires the longer digit of a V-sign.


To cut the story short, i was told to fax an ackowledgement form to reserve the NEW & IMPROVED noteboook. Now, they forgot one minor detail. They misplaced the fax machine that was supposed to come along with the apology-mail. Cos i can't fax from home. And screw me if i'd spend another few dollars, and in this case also, get someone else to go to the nearest post office and fax that document on my behalf.


The best part is, i have my own collection party arriving from Dubai, via Melbourne, cos she does not enjoy fighting with me over who gets to use the internet so that new laptop is our saviour. Now she gets to collect fuck all cos nothing was done earlier to rectify any possible problems.


Maybe it was my fault to hand over the initial collection issues to my brother. Cos he didn't do anything about it. Then again, ultimately, its not his problem. I should have made the call and necessary arrangements myself.


So i'm not totally sore about this. I'm just hoping Niza and I won't argue on who get to use the PC. Althougth i doubt it would be peacefully solved.

What's for lunch?

I'm having Beef Teriyaki Bento.

You?

Had that once before and it tastes ok. Lazy to cook la today. Maybe tonight cook nasi goreng. Want some? It's nice ok. I haven't had any complaints yet. Aiyah, at most ur colon melt onie. Chilli is good, trust me.

Just woke up actually. And saw that there're a few people who visited me blog.

That might be you there. Eh, mind leaving a comment?

Ryhan and Rahim may sound like life partners but they're actually old skool mates of mine from 2 different phases of my life. As secocok as they may sound together, i doubt they kenal each other (still, SG is so small...who knows!).

Oh wait, they do! We all from same poly rite? Kan? Oh ya...i remember our McDonald times. Cuma si Ryhan is not from engineering, he design peeper. And we also from same high schoooo. And Rahim always sounds like he's high on something. He's off of it now i guess, slightly mellow nowsadays. I guess shirt and tie does that to u. Nice to know he's still keepin' it real wit his long-time-luv.

Speaking of long-time-luvs, ever wondered what happened to ur Ex? Or in my case, Exes? I'm not ashamed to say that out loud cos i'm sure i'm not the only dude out there with a few failed relationships. And i'm not scared to raise this topic cos Niza is secur...hmmmm...well...she is a girl...and this can be risky....ok....i better end the topic here. Let's just say i forgot what i wanted to say.

I haven't got assurance from her and the woman is not around, so let's be safe. Anyway, who in the right mind would think abt their Exes when they're having it good in a beautiful relationship. Like, it's not like i ever thought abt such stuff. Pffffft...not me~ I would never.

Oh no, the old hag is back! THE old hag! From the clinic! And she's bragging about her "illness". I'm finding it hard to type whilst eavesdropping on her conversation sia! She says she's gonna need aspirin everyday because of her problematic vein. Aspirin? So u take panadol everyday. Wow, you must be the first registered daily panadol user. PFFT!! Need to book for MRI, meet neurologist cos got blood clot here and there and here and might clot somewhere else if not treated immediately. I hope blood clots on her throat so atleast i cannot hear her hyena voice.

Abeh malam gi clubbing. Sap buah la.

Now she said she wants to pass me her cigz. Cos she cannot smoke anymore. *eBhUeLmLeShHeImT!!!*Let's see how long that's gonna last.

Ahhh..she's back in her room. Finally.

Dala, ilang stim ah to write. See u guys later ah...


I thought abt ending it here but wait, just to clarify the notion that i might not be giving the old bird the benefit of the doubt - it's been less than 10mins since she said she can't smoke; The old hag just lit a bad boy.

I...am...so....pissed!!!

Cleanliness is overrated!

I have messed up Niza's room so bad sia. I would love to show u pics of it but i scared wait she use it against me. The couch outside can be very cold at night u noe. Just recall the scene when the Autonomous Robotic Lifeforms from Cybertron (better known as Autobots) destroyed Sam's dad's garden. Optimus Fandy has struck again.

Now how to clean the room? There are 3 bed spreads strewn over and under the bed and all i'm thinking is why do we need 3 bed spreads in the 1st place?

Don't get me started on her cushy-cushy space. It's a spot infront of her wardrobe where she displays all her nice furry-furry cushions on her cute hairy-hairy rug. It's her cuddly inanimated zoo. They look like road kill now.

My clothes are everywhere and i have no idea how to solve that problem cos there's simply no more cabinet handles to hang them. Why must there be only 4 doors?????

And i NEED to hang them to airdry so that i don't have to wash them often. Last time i did that my t-shirt shrank 2 sizes but we had a good laff about it cos my severely unconditioned figure showed gloriously in the top. All i needed was a shave to pass off as a Thai gayboy.

I'm sniffing around now but i don't trust this onion nose of mine. I'm sure it stinks here. Eau De Fandy. Maybe i should bottle it. And sell it as cheap pepper spray or something.

There's a plate of shit infront of her tv. Don't ask me what it's doing there cos my shit don't look so dark. And a glass of.....cheese? Hmmm...i don't remember drinking cheese. I had milk and cookies. But that was Sunday. Last Sunday.

Am i gonna get it from her? I am aren't i? She's such a Monica when she sees disorderly things. I need a plan. A very VERY good plan. I need something to sort this whole mess out. Something to get everything back in Niza Order.

I know, i'll start by writing an entry...

I hang out too much with girls.

Those are brave words, i know.

I need the smell of musk, an unshaven chin, strong manly arms, and probably some rough slapping of the...shit, this sounds so wrong. I've got to have some male companionship. Pronto.

There's nothing wrong hanging out with girls. But have them around u 24/7 and u'll start saying stuff like those above.

Staying with Niza allows me to be in constant contact with ladies because:

1. She has 2 Female housemates.
2. Other Female building mates hang out at her place
3. She has lots of Female colleagues and friends

There will be Female night outs where i am invited because they treat me like one of them since they see no harm in talking to me as i am with Niza so i wouldnt be having other thoughts if they approached me for a light and they wouldnt need to have other thoughts too if i approached them and asked if they wanted a refill.

This is a wonderful system if u ask me, especially so as many of them are really fine specimens - but of cos, no one beats my Bb - but sooner or later u'll be tired of cocktails and just wish u can have a simple pint of beer.

And i'm tired of dealing with Girly issues. Like, keeping one very drunk girl from sleeping with the very drunk boy. If i was with boys, we'd encourage such stuff. (Don't u guys dare turn ur back on this. Admit it. We give awards for such tricks.)

When i'm with the ladies however, OTHER men would stare at me and give me that why-are-u-turning-ur-back-on-ur-kind look. What can i do fellas? Don't look at me that way. U know my girl is with me. My junior's sole function depends on what i say or do now.

The turning point is when i start to understand certain things from a girl's point of view. Like reading between the lines of certain comments.

If i were to say, "You went out so fast ah?" to a girl...

she'd hear it as: "Oh, u noticed me going in and out of the house?"

Or if i were to go out into the hall when they are making a lot of noise then i am acknowledging their attention grabbing antics. Or something like that. (I shall stop this now as i would like to state that i still love pussy too much to understand further about my feminine side)

See? I must be raising some male eyebrows now.

Ok la, i shall stop ranting about my "non-existent" female issues. I'm a man. And i love being one. Come to think of it, i'm a hungry man.

I think i have to go cook. Then clean the kitchen. Tidy up the room. Get some laundry done and if time permits clip my nails and then slap some moisturiser on my...fuck. It's happening again.

Dude, ease up.

Rite, this goes to the boys.


Why do boyfriends stop their girlfriends from going out?


Bb asked her friend, Y, out for dinner but she matter-of-factly turn down our invitation due to an Executive Order made by her boyfriend. She was not allowed to go out. For dinner.


That is something i'd expect to hear if i asked a friend out for football during primary school.


"Aku takyeh kuar ah Fandy. Mak aku suroh aku abeskan homewerk dulu. Kau dabes eh?"

"Homewerk? Aku kat skolah dabes. Sbelom cikgu kasi aku dabes. Eh, besok kau kasi aku tengok homework kau sbelom hand in eh? Aku nak 'check'."


U get my point? It was actually Bb who raised this topic with me. Cos she could not understand why must men be so controlling sometimes. And usually without any solid reason to.


Case in point, Bb's friend S. She is not allowed to go out AT ALL. Meaning the only way she can step out for some stale, humid, nasal burningly hot Dubai air is to instigate a SILENT WAR or most effectively, lie.


I do not condone lying but we do it all the time - except for me, of course - and most of the time it's the last most efficient resort. Unfortunately, they will be so guilty that they'll confide with their friends about the emotional turmoil they have put themselves in and that is when ideas like condoms are thought about.


But when u delve deeper into the mechanics of their relationship, it can sometimes be one getting back at each other. And S's boyfriend is getting back at her because of something that happened when he did allow her to go out. So i suppose padan muka la.


Still, my question is, and i'm repeating here, since when does girlfriends and boyfriends need to get one another's permission to go out?


Bb puts it very simply to me:

"Sejak biler jantan tu kasi aku makan? Apa, dier kasi aku duit beli baju kepe? Selagi dier takde kene menenge ngan aku, jgn nak step laki aku. Mak bapak aku sendiri takde cakap ni smuer. Apa dier nak take over kepe?"


I got those "classic" Niza lines straight to my face. Weirdly, my smile was still on. Cos i know she does ask for my opinion on everything. Wic can sound contradicting but its not like a permission per se, but more of an assurance that i am ok with everything. Wic means respect. And i respect the fact that she does what she has to do regardless if i allow it or otherwise. So i let her do watever the hell she wants.


And that works for us. Although sometimes she does not do watever things i say is ok with me cos i belive she knows i might get upset over it. Like going out for a drink immediately after a flight for example. I dont mind. I'm only worried if she does not get enough rest for her next flight. But she insists i might get upset that she might not be spending enuff MSN time with me.


Talking about weird fights, we sometimes argue when we ALLOW each other to go out. Just cos we worry if the other party might not allow it. Maybe we care for each other too much. Is there such a thing?


Back to my question.


Yes, since when? I'm talking about those partners, usually the male, who simply do not give any leeway to their significant other. As the victim, don't u feel smothered? Or maybe deep, deep down, u do love being controlled?


If so, why complain? Why make it a big deal if he doesnt let u out?


I would gladly give a male perspective at this point but i cannot cos i'm not that sort. But as with all male issues, u need not look further than the member behind the zipper.


It's all about the ego babe. If u have completer control over that someone, then suddenly he has a penis the size of a bolster.


So the more u listen, the bigger his junior becomes. Before u know it, ur fighting with 2 dicks.


So whats the conclusion?

• If he smothers, that should be an internal alarm.
• If u let it be, then u deal with it. Stop stealing our girlfriends cos u need to talk abt a poblem u made for urself.
• If its a poblem he has, ask ur girlfriend's boyfriend if he has any issues regarding the term "accessory to murder".
• If u think it can be solved amicably, good, do it. Quit asking for 2nd, 3rd or 275th opinions.
• If u feel u need attention no matter who its from cos u get none due to ur overbearing boyfriend, stop it. The thing i hate most other than rude people, are attention-seekers. So yes, ur rude and attention-seeking so u deserve all that misery. And more if possible.
• If u've done everything here and still things are not looking up; lie.

So u see, it all comes down to that convenient little line u'd most probably hear as, "i think i'm gonna do my laundry and retire early. It's been a tiring week. Wanna catch up on some sleep."

Believe me boys, when women lie, they do it very well. Make sure junior don't get too big to cover ur eyes.